Here’s the news you may have missed:

Elon Musk’s chatbot Grok praised Hitler. Musk said he didn’t know what happened: “It should have acted much worse!” 

In an effort to hang onto talent, Goldman Sachs is planning to implement a system where employees will be required to sign a form every 3 months where they confirm not having accepted a job offer elsewhere. The bank came up with this approach after consulting that lady from Misery.

US sprinter Chris Robinson has been offered a modeling contract after his penis repeatedly flopped out of his trunks during his race. The moment was tough to watch, especially for straight men: the moment kept being blurred out of their hundreds of Google search results.   

Tinder is running a pilot project where California users are required to mandatory facial recognition registration. In California, covering your face’s only OK during shoplifting.

Theatre chain AMC caused much outrage after it announced it will run commercials for between 25 and 30 minutes after listed start times. The news is seen as devastating for people who can’t just time their arrival 25 minutes after the listed time.

As less positions require a university degree, an AI scientist is predicting the launch of trade schools that will teach how to use AI in a particular domain. For example, metalsmith schools will teach how to ask ChatGPT, ‘Is that sheet metal growing back there cancerous?’

Findings from a new research show that, unlike previously thought during the pandemic, getting  a pet does not increase one’s well-being. Asked about the nature of happiness, a dog was unable to comment, too busy enjoying his third poo helping today.

A new law in Tennessee now allows courts to revoke a minor’s driver’s license if found guilty of bullying or cyberbullying. “How am I gonna get to work after school, now!?” said Clyde, the school’s 8-year-old menace.

Scientists have experienced a major breakthrough in understanding how the human body rejects pig organs. The study about rejecting pig organs is also considered a how-to manual against Diddy.

A promising medical procedure has reversed deafness for trial patients with one single shot. Not everybody’s on board. People who accidently heard Justin Bieber’s new album want their deafness back.